I've talked about involving the Bear in chores and cooking before. I have sensed a near mini tantrum when I almost take the "easy way out"....or what seems like it would be the "easy way out" of a situation. These are moments where I'm sure other parents have gone through with their first thought of taking something away from their tot because it seems like the easiest route, because I have taken this route before. When we take this "easy" route, I've learned, we are missing out on a teaching/learning opportunity. I'm slowly grasping that if you let them help it is actually easier and the fuss factor goes down to single digits...letting them be involved is actually the more rewarding route...and because it is rewarding it seems easier - of course it takes more patience, it takes the willingness to teach your child, and you have to accept that it might get messy. It's one of those funny things where you can't-believe-it-'til-you-try-it kinda things; you think it would take more energy to show them how to do something and less energy to take it away from them and make them sit down and watch (and ultimately cry because you took something away from them [an idea, an object, a learning moment]).
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| Helping with the dishes. |
Here are two examples:
Feeding Dickie the Cat:
The Bear used to move the cat's bowls off the floor and onto the counter because he saw us doing that. We would do that so that he wouldn't eat or play with her food and water. Then I decided to try and teach him how to feed her because I thought that was the logical next step on teaching him that Dickie the Cat needs nourishment too and that the food and water in her bowl aren't things to play with. One of the first days that I started this was a day where he grabbed her water dish (full of water) and I said, "Stan B, please put that down, that's for kitty." He was determined to put it up on the counter; he was trying to be helpful. I repeated myself. He kept trying to walk with it to the counter with the water sloshing to and fro. I grabbed it from him and he fussed. I explained that it was Dickie's water bowl and she used it to drink from. Instead of putting it back up on the counter and having him continue to fuss I said to him, "Can you put her bowl back on the floor?" and I handed the bowl back to him. He put it on the floor. It worked! (this time.) Another day he grabbed her dry food dish and dumped her food out, onto the floor. (GRRRRRRRRRRRR. This is where I can easily lose my cool. If I'm tired there is a higher chance of cool going out the window. But I managed to stay calm.) I swept up the food while Stan B held the dust pan and then we swapped: I held the dustpan and he swept. We aren't a very efficient team as Stan B's dustpan and sweeping skills have not been perfected but I think it helps to teach him that if we spill something we must clean it up. Instead of filling up the bowl myself I said, "Stan B, would you like to help me feed kitty?" and so I let him scoop out the dry food and put it in her bowl. I told him to put the cup back in the storage container and help me put the lid back on. He followed my directions perfectly (this time.)
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| Helping make another batch of brussel sprouts with sweet potatoes (they are purple sweet potatoes!) |
Kitchen Chores:
The only way I can put a dent in house cleaning is if I do much of it while caring for the Bear. Because he is so active it can be challenging to empty the drain, do laundry or wipe the table while also making sure he doesn't start playing with the kitty litter. I could easily put up the safety gates and keep him out of the kitchen while I clean...and I have tried that but boy, is it a pain in the ass. If he's in the right mood he will stand there hemming and hawing to let him into the kitchen. I have involved him in cooking which he really seems to enjoy. He has helped me with laundry by handing me clothes as I then place them in the machine. I can ask him to put things in the trash or recycling and he knows which is which. He helps me empty the drain by handing me dishes as I put them away.
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| Helping Nana grate cheese. |
By letting him be involved in things, instead of shielding him from them, there is a lot less combat in our household...fewer "nos" are spoken. There is still whining and crying and typical toddler traits but I think his involvement in things will help when these terrible twos are in full throttle because they are already helping now! (You can laugh at me later when they are in full throttle and I am overwhelmed with no clue of what to do!)
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