The Potty

This is him on the pot in NC

I've been reading about ways to potty train for years it seems...maybe more like 1.5 years. I have a friend who sent me a 40 page potty training guide that she used and so, I thought I would tackle it full on this way but then I read up to page ten and had a change of heart. Page ten starts off with the title: What I Expect From You (the author is talking about the parent or the trainer) and then listed these expectations:

If you watch television at certain times, this will change. 
If you have a workout schedule, this will be impacted. 
If you run errands, this will be impacted. 
If you spend a lot of time online, this will be impacted. 
If you spend a lot of time on the phone, this will be impacted. 
If you nap, this will be impacted. 
If you work at home, this will be impacted.

I probably sighed and closed the document on my computer because at this time (he was about 20 months) I think we we fell back into a bad sleeping zone and I was too exhausted to add the challenge of potty training to my to-do list. So I put the idea of potty training on the back burner.

Somewhere in between 20 months and his 2nd birthday he started lying down on the ground and telling me to change his diaper. This was a definite sign of readiness to be potty trained. So I became more proactive about his little potty in the bathroom. I would make sure that it was there and open, ready for him to sit...and then we moved across the country and I wasn't fully committed to potty training on the road.

Once we settled in, months after the Bear's 2nd birthday he started wanting to "pee like Papa." So we would show him how to do that by standing on his bathroom stool. His favorite part is flushing the toilet.

One morning after his initial diaper change I decided to let him run around without any pants or diaper but told him that if he needed to pee that he had to go on the potty. I think he peed 4 times on the potty that morning. The next morning he did it again; I thought that he was well on his way to being trained so I thought a fun thing to do would be to go to the store and get some big boy undies, so we did. The next morning after he made his first pee on the potty I put his big boy undies on and 15 minutes later he peed in them. I realized that wearing something made him feel like he was wearing a diaper. This lasted a week and then it happened less. I don't quite remember why. I just wasn't fully committed. (This was last fall.)

A brief stint in undies.

In the last 2 months we made a potty chart. We call it the Poo-Poo Train Track. I drew train tracks and every time he peed on the potty he would get a sticker. If he pooped on the potty he would get 2 stickers. If he initiated having his diaper changed he would get a sticker. Once the chart is filled he gets to go to the store to pick out a toy of his choice (within reason). So far he has filled in two charts. We are working on our third chart.

Daycare has been great in working with him on going on the potty. He has pull up diapers that he uses too. Some days he will use the potty all day and never wet his diaper. Some days he only uses the potty once or twice. I think what they do is put him on the potty every 1-2 hours just to get him to try and pee. I wasn't doing that at home.

This is one of his daily summary sheets from daycare on a good potty day!

I think nothing was truly sticking up until now because I wasn't ready to take the plunge. That page ten in the potty training guide must have really messed with me. So, it wasn't until I was committed that we started seeing progress.

I am committed now. This is why: A new school. We found the loveliest school for him. We love where he is now but this new place is really special. It has fewer students. It's for 3-6 year olds. It's a Montessori and play based inspired school. There is one lead teacher and she has an assistant that comes in 1-2 times per week; so there is consistency. They have two guinea pigs and chickens. There is a sweet play area. They have a garden that they help plant and eat from. When we got the tour it was amazing watching the Bear in the space. He was completely engaged and calm yet excited. We asked for a spot and we got it! (He'll start there in mid-August) The only thing that the teacher asked was to have him mostly potty trained (eek!) and that she would check back with our progress at the end of May (eek! eek!) That there lit a fire under my tushie.

First: What we've done-
We started two Saturdays ago and I put him in big boy undies all weekend. He had 3 accidents. One on the sidewalk in front of our house and two at the park. All pee accidents. He pooped on the potty both days with success and pure excitement and pride, "Mama! Come here! I did it! I did it!" I even took a picture, but I won't share it here. I did send the pic to Mike though, lucky duck. I believe he had one accident at daycare on the Monday following that initial weekend. Tuesday morning he had a pee accident in his bedroom. But when he first woke up that day he said, "I have to go potty" and proceeded to run to the bathroom and went pee!! So proud. Tuesday at daycare he had one accident again. When he came home that night he pooped (for the fourth day in a row) and he called out, "Mama! Come here!" When I go tot the bathroom he said, "I have a surprise for you!" and when he stood up he pointed at the poop in his potty and said, "Tada! Poop!" Ha! Wednesday through Friday at daycare he was accident free! He had an accident when he was out with Papa on Saturday and one pee accident with me on Sunday on our bike ride but he is consistent with his poops. No poop accidents! We are so proud.

Second: How we did it-
Jelly beans. I told myself I would never do this but played it over and over in my head, how could it hurt? The only two things I could think of were a) cavities and b) we will have to transition him out of the jelly bean reward. My solutions are a) brush more often and b) slowly transition him out of the jelly bean rewards after he gets the hang of it. I also think that having him in undies will make him feel uncomfortable because they don't have the wicking powers of a diaper and he will not want to sit in a soiled diaper for very long. We'll see. I'll provide an update with the jelly bean rewards. I think having conversations about it with him will really help with the transition. He understands sooo much. It's amazing.

Third: What I've learned so far-
a) Read past page 10 of the potty training guide because potty training so far hasn't impacted any of that stuff that was listed.
b) Bring extra dipes, pants (at least two pairs) and wipes where ever you go. Accidents happen.
c) Accidents aren't as terrible as I thought they would be. When they do happen stay calm; it's not a big deal.
d) Ask if they need to go potty often. Remind them that they are wearing underwear and not a diaper. If it has been awhile since they have peed and they still say they don't need to go, go anyway, I bet the pee will flow.
e) He has an expression that he makes when he needs to go potty. So I call him on it and he always says, yeah, I gotta go pee (or poo) and runs to the bathroom.

On Sunday we went for a long bike ride and he peed 3 times on the side of the trail. He LOVED doing that. He would say, "I peed in the bushes!" or "I peed on the rocks!" When we got home he said, "I need to go pee!" and ran toward the door to go outside. I quickly said, "When we are at home we pee in the toilet. " He paused, looked at me and said, "Oh, O.K." and went in the bathroom. YAY!

So, I wouldn't say he is fully potty trained (he is still sleeping in a diaper) but we are getting there and seeing progress! Leaps and bounds!